10 things I want for Christmas…

1. Metro Ethernet between our offices. Bottlenecks on long distance links are enough to drive one to the bottle instead.
2. Middleware that integrates all our business systems with drag and drop      functionality. Adine, our new Business Analyst, put up a slide at this week’s Exco meeting listing all the systems she’d identified in Storm. Where did all these disparate systems appear from?!
3. Business analysts who have the energy of 18 year olds and the wisdom of 60 year olds. Oh, and the negotiation skills of Nelson Mandela. Adine? Now where did she go all of a sudden?!
   
4. Elvish software developers that develop code overnight, thus meeting the CEO’s   idea of reasonable project deadlines. The code of course would be fully commented and documented. And it would work.
5. A workflow system that automatically nags the joint CEO’s to approve project      proposals within a week of receiving them. Failure to comply would electronically suspended their golf club membership. Or redirect all calls to book tee-off times to my cell… hah!
6. Desktop applications that work 100% like Microsoft, but run on linux.
   
7. First level helpdesk staff with N+ and MCSE’s and a degree in linguistics to      interpret what users are actually saying.
8. Phat broadband links to all staff homes and multi-media collaboration systems      that enable telecommuting. Either that or a company helicopter shuttle service.
9. An MIS system that generates insights instead of reports, in such persuasive      terms the Board wonder why the hell they did not think of it themselves and double my salary.
10. A remote office in the Seychelles with a backdrop that looks just like my office at work. And a PA who looks remarkably like Jamie-Lee Curtis in “A Fish called Wanda”!
    

Ah well… socks again for Christmas and back to slaying dragons armed with a wet noodle in the New Year I suppose…

That’s me.

Comments

[Alan Levin]

Gee, since when do desktop apps run 100% on Microsoft? And since when do they not run 100% on Linux? On my desktop apps run better on Linux than MS.... well at least the system does (most of the time).

[DaveG]

So close, yet so far away for me Avinash! ;) Like you & your attempt to see U2, I think I'd have to resort to being a deck hand on a freighter and jumping ship as they sail past.

all the best,

Dave

[Avinash Kaushik]

I live in the far away US but I wish to visit the Seychelles one of these days. It just looks so beautiful.

Here's to hoping some of your wishes come true! Cheers!!!

-Avinash.